...music video? - If This TV Could Talk

Rating

single star

RIYL

People who like/do things because they are “ironic”
Pitchfork.com
Tweed
Hipsters

Release Date

05/03/2011

Label

Tranxcend

Tracklist

1. No Things Happen for Reasons
2. You're Not In Love
3. All I Really Know
4. In Case We Catch Fire
5. I'm Afraid of Everything
6. Another Natural Disaster
7. I Like You
8. Not Worth Your Time
9. Ballad of Red Klotz
10. Beezwax (None of Your)

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So I pressed play and within thirty seconds I was saying to myself, “Oh fuck, Jacopo, what have you gotten yourself into this time?” My first inclination was to give ...music video? the benefit of the doubt, thinking perhaps being raised on the teet of Bad Brains had spoiled me always and forever on anything patently “mellow.” Then I went through my musical rolodex like an anti-Joel Bauer and realized this was hardly the case. So why did I feel like I was watching the end credits of a quirky indie comedy?

Aaaaahhhhh, where to begin? Could it be that everything about this release is impossibly cliché? Could it be that it likely would have scored a 7.2 over at Pitchfork? How about the fact that their vocalist can’t decide if he wants to be Elton John or an earnest-on-steroids Bowie? The answer is yes, and I would not be surprised if people who love shitty sunglasses, write shittier poetry, and think cassette tapes are “novel” would also be all about If This TV Could Talk.

That this is hipster-bait is one grievance; the abhorrent lyrics are another. Not only are they, too, hackneyed to death, but I could predict upwards of ninety percent of the rhyming couplets with ease. Also the band’s name sucks. And the album title sucks. And if you’re wondering why I’m resorting to juvenile chest-poking, look no further than the liner notes. My God, any fourth-grader could write lines like this, yet …music video? stands somewhere at the nexus of noise-pop (whatever the fuck that is) and SXSW credibility, evidently having been written up on NPR’s website.

So ye elitists of the tousled hair and mochaccinos can get all hot under the collar for these bands that are the farthest thing from threatening, playing their tidy little day-care music, and those of us who are actually serious can cling to our Zombi and Converge records no matter how badly you want to take them away from us.

I’m awarding this one star because the electronic moments are occasionally engaging.

--Jacob Oliver

Last updated: 04/13/2011 01:35PM

Comments

Aaron Yarborough
04/13/2011
11:08PM
Age: 30
Location
Atascadero, CA

wow, this has to be a joke.. i was confused at first and well.. im still confused.

Decoymusic.com (CEO/Founder)
Blue Reef Design Studios (Web Development)
http://aarontroy.tumblr.com

Rick Gebhardt
04/14/2011
04:32AM
Age: 31
Location
Minnesota

Apparently not. I listened to a couple of songs when I sent this to Jake and knew almost instantly this album was a 2 star or less affair. I just don't understand the appeal of junk like this.

Find me EVERYWHERE:

Bill Lohr
04/14/2011
07:48AM
Age: 28
Location
Lehigh Valley, PA

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